Hi. Remember
me? Yeah, I know it’s been a long
time and you’ve probably forgotten all about me. Well, I’m back and I have some news…
ME: I quit my job.
YOU: Do you have a new one?
ME: No.
YOU: (awkward silence)
Now, most of you are probably thinking “Well, that was
dumb.” Yes, I realize that people
are not knocking down my door to give me a job and that our economy, well, she
ain’t the prettiest right now. And
many of you have asked, “So what’s your plan?”
Here’s my answer: I wasn’t happy and I am going to change
that…how? I have no effing clue. But this is how I am going to start -
It’s ten minutes until 1PM on a Wednesday and I’m still in
my pajamas drinking coffee. Why am
I drinking coffee so late? Well,
because I love coffee and I got up about 45 minutes ago. Why am I still in my pajamas? Because pajamas are comfortable –
duh. Some of you might be pretty
jealous (good) and some of you are probably judging me (bad).
Here’s my logic (if you can call it that)…Those of you who
know me pretty well are aware that 1) I’ve been through more crap storms in my
30 years on this planet than one needs to and 2) I tend to take care of others
more than I take care of myself (I know, JUST like Mother Teresa). I’m not going to get into the details
of said storms of crap because all that counts is that I came out of
them…clean. Through all these
storms, I had always felt like it was my job to take care of everyone else, like
a personified FEMA with a better track record. When was this great responsibility bestowed upon me? It never was. I’m not really sure when the idea that I was the ONLY one
capable of handling everyone else’s needs and that I actually COULD without any
consequences to my own sanity popped into my head, but I’m pretty sure it’s my
dead mother’s fault. And pause for
another awkward silence…
Did she just blame her dead mother? No….not so much blame, as attribute.
My mother, Missy, was AMAZING. She literally took care of everyone and everything. From advising people on fabrics for
their new sofa to chairing a book fair to holding the hand of a friend when the
doctor says “It’s cancer.” – my mother would take care of everything, except
herself. She truly loved taking
care of people, it was just who she was…but as I look back, I realize that she
was also probably a bit of a control freak, who couldn’t and wouldn’t let
others help. I’m not really sure
why she was this way but I know that she struggled with it in the same ways I
have. It’s difficult to explain,
but I know it created stress for her as it does with me. (She literally didn’t trust any of us
to write her obituary correctly and wrote part it her self…very Missy) And who needs more stress in their
lives? Anyone? Anyone?
Bueller?
So, here’s what I’m going to do…give myself a freaking
break! I’m going to stop and think
about ME!
ME! ME! ME! – when was the last time you did that?
I’m not saying become a self-centered ass of a person, but
take some time out and reflect on how YOU are treating YOURSELF.
So when you are worried that your company will completely
collapse if you take a Friday off to spend with your family or that your friend
will completely disown you because you didn’t want to be a host of her shower
because you are becoming the real life version of Katherine Heigl in “27
Dresses”….think of the Honey Badger and ask yourself, “What would the Honey
Badger do?”.
Answer: Honey
Badger don’t care. Honey Badger
don’t give a shit.
And if you haven’t met the Honey Badger, why the hell not:
As I conjure up my dream job (or a job) and how to get it, I
will try to be more diligent in my posts.
Apparently, writing makes me happy…
Living the dream…
Mer
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